Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
The adults are the big ones right?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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