You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where does the pee come out of this thing
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize