his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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