Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
