So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
