is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
