I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
