Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
