But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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