He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
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I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
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My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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