it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
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And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
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I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
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