So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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