Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I can't turn off my feet"
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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