dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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