Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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