no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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