ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize