Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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