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: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Randomize
