We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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