I love black thongs
someone get that fucking seahorse.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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