So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
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