you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
