He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
