brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
