I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
