Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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