Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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