lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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