just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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