A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
