Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Randomize
