these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
birth control should be required to get into college
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
