My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
