i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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