There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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