I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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