But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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