so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
