Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
zippers are such a cool invention
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
