worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
