He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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