then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize