trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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