It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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