Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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