I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize