So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
