Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize