I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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