it hurts more in the daytime
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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